2023 kicked my ass! If there is one thing I was always able to put stock in, it was my work ethic and my value I brought as an employee. Well I lost 2 jobs last year, one was an agreed furlough because the company was doing poorly and the other was a total surprise. Best salary I had ever had and I was extraordinarily excited about the work and the company. The excuse? Not the right fit (AKA, I think I rubbed the young CEO the wrong way and she made them ditch me).
That sent me into a surprising tailspin. I doubted my worth, my capabilities and questioned everything about my previous accomplishments. I just couldn't shake it. To add onto that, this meant that financially we were in a real bind. I was not the sole provider but definitely the highest earner so losing that income had me stressed; could we keep our house, could we pay our bills.
I languished in a state of disbelief and depression for a couple months. At some point, I started turning the corner though. I have a series of epiphanies that really helped shape up what I am calling my comeback year.
The first "Aha" moment was that I actually didn't want to be the main provider and have the financial burden rest on me anymore. Action? Talk to the family and build a plan that we all pitched in equally to make the numbers work.
The second "Aha" was that I don't want to be a full-time grinder at a job I'm doing that I don't enjoy. In fact I want to spend my time practicing retirement! I asked myself, "Alright lady, does retirement really look like you binging TV shows and slumping around? NO, it means you take care of yourself, you get active, you work on fun projects for money and probably go waitress locally for some extra cash".
Another "Aha" for me was realizing that when all is said and done, hubby and I can easily live (and thrive) if we rented our home here and lived abroad for 4-6 months a year. Our pensions can cover those expenses. What does that mean? There is no "destitute", there is no homeless. Approaching this with my husband was another hurdle I needed to face and surprisingly, he was supportive.
Moving isn't our first choice but an option we will keep open. Plus we are now talking about spending a month or two in different countries for fun but also it will depend on if renting out home is feasible in this area.
Fast forward from AHA to action plan. I asked how and what I could do for my health and wellness. I'm sure the formula is different for everyone but basically, instead of grabbling coffee and watching something on TV my days start like this; Get up, put on kettle for tea. I like the ritual of making tea (steeped leaves, not bags), put on my yoga (ish) clothes and head into my office with my tea. I do 10 minutes of stretching followed by 30 minutes on the treadmill listening to podcasts. I have found quite a few people I really enjoy listening to.
Once I am done with treadmill I have another cup of tea, journal for a while and then get on with my day. I am trying to have 1 hour of "creative" balance, building puzzles, reading (mostly puzzles at this point). I am also practicing intermittent fasting on a 16:8 schedule which has been surprisingly easy to do. So far out of January I have accomplished my goals 10 out of 13 days.
My "comeback" year is really celebrating turning 60 every day. Be healthy, get fit, hopefully also lose weight in that so I can build my confidence. In the short time I have been doing this I have so much more energy, drink MUCH less (which I needed to do) and have a general "peace" in my life.
This is the very first time in my life that I actually felt that living well and taking care of yourself, being positive can manifest positive outcomes. I have been offered some PT project work with a lady who has her own company and is amazing, and have another lead that approached me with some future work.
I didn't want the year of turning 60 to be the beginning of the end but the beginning of a new journey which makes the next chapter fulfilling and exciting. I'll keep you posted on the progress here on Conquering Momma. I wish you all much joy this year and hope you take care of you, prioritize your health and wellness. Dig deep to figure out what can help you on this journey to peace and make a plan. Til we engage again!
Conquering Momma, Lisa